HUMOR: Best Friends Think Rooming Together Is a Great Idea

By Louis Rodriguez, Humor Editor

RUBIN RESIDENCE HALL — Best friends since high school, Daniela Ramos and Lindsey Salazar, have been ready to room together since they found out that they were both going to NYU, warding off all warnings from their family and friends that this was a horrible idea.

“I mean, what can’t be amazing about two best friends living together?” Daniela asked, letting out a sinister chuckle. “It’s going to be like, so great.”

Privately, Daniela was the first one to admit concern. Despite Lindsey’s promise that she would never sexile Daniela, she was nervous that Lindsey’s hot boyfriend would be there 24/7. If Lindsey broke her promise, Daniela swore to be totally uncool about it by blow-drying her hair early in the morning, taking 30-minute showers and never cleaning the dishes.

“I’m a great roomie,” Lindsey said, unaware of what would come to pass. “I fall asleep around one in the morning, watching Netflix, and if ‘The Crown’ can’t put you to sleep, I don’t think anything can.”

Lindsey believes her habit of smoking the occasional joint and vaping mad clouds would never interfere with her friendship, as long as she could do it without any complaints ever coming up. Her only worry is how similar their personalities were.

“When you get two anxious people in one room together, they cancel out the anxiety, right?” Lindsey asked, reaching for her JUUL to avoid a panic attack. “That’s just math.”

She believes her unbelievable empathy will keep their friendship strong no matter how many times she forgets about birthdays or special events.

“If it doesn’t end up working out, I’ve got another close friend from high school I can use as a backup,” Daniela said. “She’s probably a better person anyway.”

On move-in day, Lindsey and Daniela were placed in the smallest, crappiest room in Rubin Hall.

 

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