Distance: Love’s Greatest Enemy

Many couples aren’t as lucky as Jess Chen and Kyle Mariana to live in the same city. Long distance relationships can be difficult, but trust and positivity are key.

It’s that time of year again, when the price of a bouquet of roses surges, reserving a table in a nice restaurant becomes impossible and every soft breeze in New York City is mixed with the taste of love. St. Valentine’s Day is just around the corner. However, Feb. 14 isn’t always so pleasant for lovers, especially those involved in long-distance relationships.

CAS sophomore Xujia Hu, who entered a long distance relationship four months ago, has already tasted this bitterness.

“It is so hard to be physically apart and not being able to celebrate special days like the coming Valentine’s Day together,” Hu said. “I really miss him.”

Hu’s boyfriend lives in Delaware, about 200 miles from New York City. The couple was only able to reunite twice last month.

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Distance can be love’s greatest enemy. It stretches its evil claws towards couples far apart, leaving them with loneliness and longing. In fact, at NYU, many couples enjoy the sweetness of love through the pain of parting, but they manage to overcome the challenge and maintain their relationships.

CAS junior Liza Shcherbakova has learned to think positively. Living in New York while her boyfriend studies in New Orleans, she admits that the distance was difficult at the beginning of their relationship, but they soon came to appreciate it.

“It makes it a little bit more special, when you actually see each other,” Shcherbakova said. “You come to appreciate the time you spend together more. A long-distance relationship isn’t really that much different from the normal ones; it’s always important to learn to trust your other half and be open about your feelings.”

Shcherbakova said that couples should take it slow and build a strong foundation for their relationship.

Trust is one of the most important factors in a relationship, especially for LS sophomore Alyssa Chen, who is half a long-distance couple. Her boyfriend currently lives in Taiwan; the two will celebrate their second anniversary in August. Chen considers this accomplishment a victory, considering the hurdle of distance.

“When you can only hear the voice but are not able to feel the warmth most of the time, it’s hard to trust the person,” Chen said. “I realized once you manage to trust your boyfriend, it gets a lot easier. Try to learn how to spend time with yourself and try not to overthink about this relationship and just enjoy the moment.”

In the end, no one chooses to enter a long-distance relationship, just as no one chooses who they fall in  love with. Parting from your other half can be irritating and sometimes scary, but Shcherbakova said that it is not impossible.

“If you are into the person, it doesn’t matter where they are — across the street from New York, across the country or across the ocean,” Shcherbakova said. “You are going to make it work.”

A version of this article appeared in the Monday, Feb. 14 print edition. Email Diya Jiang at [email protected].

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1 COMMENT

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