In our latest edition of Staff Rants, our comically beautiful and talented staff has a few choice words about a variety of topics.

On Baseball:

“Take me out to the ball game,” is a phrase that I have never uttered in my life. However, I have somehow found myself sitting uncomfortably on the bleachers of a mighty four-base baseball pitch on multiple occasions. It’s not that I don’t like baseball, it’s that I don’t understand it. I have tried, oh how I have tried! But it just seems like a lot of standing around. The players on the pitch actually looked ridiculously bored at every game I have ever been to — how am I supposed to enjoy the game if the people on the mighty pitch are not even enjoying the game? Plus, the New York Mets suck. — Jemima McEvoy, News Editor

On Water Pressure:

I don’t understand how a city with some of the best water and plumbing in the world could possibly allow for dorms that have water pressure comparable to the light mist that helps to keep vegetables fresh in a market. These showers are the Washington Generals of showers. — Tom Price, Opinion Editor

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