Question #1: My girlfriend and I have been dating for almost six years, but I still cannot fully ~satisfy~ her during sex. Not even once. Do you have any suggestions?
Gabe, the gay: As a man who has sex with other men, I cannot really comprehend how this would work. Why does she keep having sex with you if this is the case? What is the point? I’m going to have to let my female friend take this one.
Luna, the lesbian: Ah, the eternal dilemma of the fragile male ego pitted against his largest fear: the female body. Don’t let it get you down. It’s not easy. Getting a girl to finish takes a lot more than your dick, so as a general suggestion, get your face and fingers down there. Don’t focus too much on penetration at all (familiarize yourself with the clitoris), and just see how much you can do with your tongue alone. If you’re not sure what exactly to do, I’d suggest the old tried-and-true ABC method: spell out the alphabet with your tongue as if you were using a flashlight to spell your name in the sky. Listen to her reactions and watch her body movements. If one letter seems to give you the best reaction, stick with it. Repetition is key, and don’t let yourself get tired. Tongue push-ups are a great way to prepare yourself.
Above all the technical details, though, communication is key. What does she want? How does she feel? You’d be surprised how much a girl is eager to share, whether she’s your girlfriend or a hookup about how she’s feeling. The perfect spot is different for every girl, and it changes, too. Make it your only mission to find it.
Finally, make sure she feels comfortable. Is she okay in the space you’re in? Is she worried? Stressed? Does she want a slice of pizza? Mindset plays a massive role in sex.
Don’t be disheartened if it doesn’t happen at first or for a long time. Ask your girl if she masturbates at all and how she does it. Vibrators or other toys might throw off her sensitivity, and if she’s not doing it at all, encourage her to give it a shot. Understanding one’s own body alone is a key first step to letting it be enjoyed with others.
Question #2: I’m a man who will be living with three women this semester, and I’m afraid it will be weird. What should I do?
Gabe, the gay: Be nice. Treat them like human beings. Don’t hit on them. It’s that simple.
Luna, the lesbian: The only thing I have to say? Don’t make period jokes. Like, ever. Blacklist anything on your mind about PMS, blood, “that time of the month” or anything of the sorts. It reduces females to the worst, most miserable (and bloody) part of their gender. They’re never funny, and it’ll set someone off every time. As long as you stay off that topic, you should be fine. Have fun and don’t be afraid of indulging in your feminine side. 😉