NYU coaches ‘real proud of the guys’

Donnie Roach, Dannie Croach, Dunlap Couch and Guy Guile.

Head sports coach Donnie Roach pushed his way to the media to deliver six words that have since echoed throughout the NYU athletic community.

“I’m real proud of the guys,” a Gatorade-soaked Roach said.

NYU sports have had an impressive year, leading many coaches to swell with pride. Roach’s statement came following every sports teams’ recent victories in which they all had more points than the other teams. Assistant sports coach Dannie Croach added that he is also real proud of the guys.

“I’m real proud of the guys,” Croach said. “We played harder and got more numbers than the other guys. When your guys beat their guys, there is no other feeling than to be real proud of them.”


The university, commonly known for having weak sports teams, has had a shockingly strong 2015 so far, and the coaches’ pride has been a large part of that.

The trend continues as more and more of NYU’s coaches tell members of the media that they are real proud of their guys, including softball coach Dunlap Couch following the team’s first ever victory as a varsity program last week.

“I’m real proud of the guys,” Couch said. “When we first came around, our guys were still getting used to sports. But looking at the guys now  I’m real proud.”

This pride has also started to spread beyond the coaching staff. Team captain Guy Guile earned his captainship for being a real guy’s guy to his teammates. Roach praised his captain during a press conference with the two.

“I’m real proud of Guy,” Roach said. “He’s a real guy’s guy, a guy who makes his guys proud.”

When asked about his guys, Guile insisted that the success of the team is not because of a single guy but rather all of the guys.

“I’m real proud of the guys,” Gulie said. “Some have said, ‘That team is all Guy,’ but I disagree. It’s not Guy, it’s the guys. All the guys. Guys and Guy working together. Take my word for it, I’m Guy. I’m also one of the guys.”

When asked about his family life, Roach said he is just as proud a father as he is a coach.

“I’m real proud of the guys,” coach Roach said. “I thank my all the guys on the team for making me a good enough guy to raise my two beautiful guys.”

A version of this article appeared in the Wednesday, April 1 print edition. Email Uncle Lightnin’ at [email protected]



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